Coaching & Mentorship with Nalini Tranquim

Does something need to change in your life?

At the end of the day, nothing will change if you don't take the necessary steps to bring about change. No matter how much you will it, change will not fall from the sky and it's unfair to expect everybody else around you to change when real change starts with you.

What's be holding you back?

In my years as a Coach & Mentor, I've observed three cheeky common culprits (Triple C for short) that hold people back from making changes in their lives.

The problem is, if you succumb to the Triple C, you'll be reading this in a year's time... and still... nothing would have changed.

Take a deep breath in and a slow exhale out, then see which of the Tripe C's resonate with you.

Three Cheeky Common Culprits (Triple C) That Prevents Change:

 1. Fear of Change

We are creatures of habit and comfort. We like it how we like it... even if it is not healthy for us. Unfortunately this leads us down a slippery slope of actually resisting change. We avoid dealing with the issue because it's easier to throw it into the 'too hard pile' as they say in Australia or 'under the rug' if you catch my drift, all in the hope that it will just fix itself. Yeah but will it?

2. Fear of Crashing

'What if I mess up and it all goes wrong?'

The good thing is, no one is asking you to fly a plane.

There's a saying:

'Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.'

I'd like to re-phrase that to:

'Better to have failed and tried than never to have tried at all.'

Here's the thing; We all seem to struggle with this silent and unfair expectation that unless we are perfect, we are not ready to try. Fact is, none of us are perfect and only a few try. But it's those few though they may fall down now and then, who have built resilience and tenacity and have learnt to get back up and keep trying.

You don't see a baby who's learning to walk, fall for the first time and refuse to get up again until he's fifty...

3. Fear of Criticism

What will people think?

What will my friends say?

Firstly, who cares about what people think? And secondly, if your friends don't say anything to support your change process, then I can't help but wonder whether they are actually true friends. 

Here's a funny image for you:

When you're in your teens, all you care about is what other people think.

When you're in your thirty's, you don't really care about what other think.

When you're in your eighty's, you realize that no one was thinking about you in the first place.

Who gives a rats?

Seriously. It's your life. You need to live it to the max and if there's something holding you back, quit standing in front of the hurdle and JUMP the bloody thing.

I will say this... it's easier to face your fears when you have someone in your corner cheering you on.

What if you just said YES?

I'm now going to counter the Triple C's with three reasons why having a Transformational Coach & Mentor can help you bring about REAL CHANGE.

Three Reasons To Say YES:

1. Support

You're not facing the change process alone! Even if people in your world aren't overly excited about the steps that you are taking, you have someone who is.  I've also come to learn that sometimes it's easier having someone in your CORNER who's not actually in your CASA (or 'home' if you want it in English). What I mean by this is a Life Coach isn't physically, mentally or emotionally involved in the circumstance that you are facing. We are able to provide impartial, unbiased and neutral support.

2. Accountability

Have you ever worked for a boss who checks up on your progress? It's not necessarily because he or she likes you, but more likely that they just need to see that you are doing what you are getting paid for. Make sense?

When you have a Life Coach in your corner, there is a level of responsibility that's required on your part, because you're going to need to report back on your progress. This isn't about control or manipulation, instead, it's a principle that works because now you can't just make excuses, because someone needs answers! I've seen the power of accountability at work because I have clients who are achieving things in their lives that they NEVER THOUGHT was possible, simply because they are answerable for the steps they are taking.

3. A fresh perspective

You may be familiar with a Renaissance proverb collection written by John Heywood in 1546 where in one of his proverbs he says;

'...From him who sees no wood for trees and yet is busie as the bees. From him that's settled on his lees, and speaketh not without his fees...'

When someone cannot see the wood from the trees, it basically means being too involved in the details of a problem that it's hard to look at the situation as a whole.

As a Life Coach & Mentor (and as I've previously stated), I'm not physically, mentally or emotionally involved in the detail of one's problem. This enables me to come into the situation with a fresh perspective. Quite often, all that is required is a new set of lenses from which one sees in order for things to turn around.

I honestly don't think there's much more for me to add here. So I will close with two questions:

1. Does something need to change in your life?

2. What if you just said yes?

What others are saying: